Have you ever wondered what if? What if you had taken that chance? What if you hadn't? What if you had never made that mistake? What if you had made a worse one? What if things had worked out differently? WHAT IF? We all wonder sometimes, but it's kind of pointless. You can wonder what if and live in the past or you can know that everything happens for a reason and live in the present. I choose to live in the here and now. I choose to not wonder what if and to just have faith that everything will work out for the best.
Love is just like life: it's what you make of it. If you never try, you never learn anything. If you never fall down, you'll never learn how to get back up. If you never have your heart broken, you'll never learn how to heal. Just because he/she decided that your connection wasn't strong enough does not mean that you are not good enough. Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. Life is all about change, and about learning to cope with those changes. Life's not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain. I know how hard that can be, trust me. I thought that I was empty, without strength, with only hate left. It's there for a while, but it's not a permanent thing. You learn to see the good in people again. I'm not saying it's easy, or fast, or that it'll be a complete renewal in your faith in humanity. I'm still regaining mine. All I'm saying is that things change. People change. Life changes. You can change the outcome based on your attitude. What counts now is how you deal with this challenge that's been set before you. Life is what you make it; make it GREAT!
Well, sometimes life sucks. Sometimes when we need people the most, they turn their backs. And sometimes, the people you thought knew you the best didn’t really know you at all. I refuse to be controlled by another person. There’s someone out there for me, someone who will love me regardless of my scars and mistakes, regardless of my ink and my choice of beverage. Someone who will take me as I am and forget the rest of the world and what they think. Someone who will get to know me for me and who will love EVERY PART OF ME.
Is it too much to ask to be accepted for who you are? No changes, no buts, no wishy washy bullshit? Is it too much to ask that if you can’t accept me for who I am, you turn and walk away? Is it too much to ask? Am I doomed to only find people who can’t accept me? I don’t think so…however, it’s hard to know sometimes what’s in store. It’s time to take my life in my own hands and to show the whole world who I am, the good I can do, and the things I can create. It’s time to listen to the people who keep telling me that I’m amazing and to make my life the best I can. Life is 10% what you make it and 90% how you take it. I’m gonna make it amazing and take it with a grain of salt and a smile. I can survive anything that life throws my way.
I have so many true friends that I thought weren’t and so many who weren’t that I thought were. This is one of those times where you realize who really matters in your life. You see who was only a “fair weather” friend and who’s always been there. You come to know just how much those who will always be there really care. You realize that they’re not just friends; they’re extended family.
All my friends and family members will support me in this. They see the good in me and I’m starting to see it too. That makes me happier than anything I’ve ever experienced in my life. Just knowing that they’ll be there for me makes this all seem so much easier. I’m not all broken up over my break-up and am I worried about that? Hell no. I’m taking life as it comes, one day at a time. I’m gonna get me a tattoo or two and I’m going to become an interior designer. I’m going to help people create their dream homes. And in my spare time, I’m going to start a youth center/group home called Compassion’s Flame. It’s going to be a place for kids to come and play and learn and hang out and crash for the night if need be. It’s going to be a place for an extended family. I’m going to find a guy who’s right for me and we’re gonna get married and have kids of our own. We’re going to design and build our dream home. We’re going to see our kids through school and onto whatever career path they choose. And then we’re going to grow old together and enjoy what we can. I’m going to start this path by finishing my associate’s degree and moving to Maricopa with my mom. Then I’m gonna get a job and start attending classes at ASU or UofA or whichever university I can afford to go to.
"...when you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew you never knew..." - Pocahontas Why can't we all understand this? That whether we be white, black, brown or purple, whether we be some form of Christian or Buddhist or Wicca or what-have-you, whether we are happy, sad, angry or resigned, whether we want to change the world or just live in it, no matter what we are, we are all human and we all need to understand that.
If we all tried to make the world a better place, it would become a better place. So what are you going to do to make the world better? I am going to do everything I can...starting with a smile =)
I may not be sure of anything, but I am who I am. Anyone’s approval is not needed.
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