It's been a while...graduation was amazing. I am very glad that I was able to receive my Associate of Applied Sciences degree...very glad that I stuck with it, that education has always been made a priority in my life. It's a choice...hell, everything's a choice, isn't it? I've made some choices that don't make sense to a lot of people...but they make sense to me, and they are my choices after all. I'm the one who has to answer for them and live with the consequences, whatever they may be. I'm trying to live my life, become the best person I can be, and if that turns anyone away, so be it, because if they're gonna turn tail and run from the true me, then that's their loss. It's not up to me who likes me and who doesn't; it's up to me to be the best me I can be and let others make their choices. Live and let live; become a great person, helping others along the way. Can I be difficult at times? Yes, but so can everyone on this earth, and I don't do it on purpose. I feel like I'm not worth it once in a while...but there's someone sitting here right in front of me who argues with me until I agree that me being worthless is total bull crap. I know I'm a good person; sometimes it just takes another person's perspective to make me see that. I am who I am...even if I don't really know who that is yet. I'm beginning to see...a few things. I may be making a HUGE mistake, but on the other hand I may be on the right track for MY kind of happy ending. Who can say? Only time will tell really. So then, the big question is WHO AM I? Well, let's try to answer that with a little trip down memory lane, and some ideas about what I'd like to do with my life, shall we?
My legal name is Lynda
Ann Wilson. I was born April 11, 1992 at 12:53pm as Lynda Ann Plourd and proceeded to grow up in
several different places till kindergarten. We settled in Boise, ID, for a couple
years and then moved to Reserve, NM. We stayed there for almost ten years, moved to
Phoenix, AZ, then Silverton, CO then Thatcher, AZ. I was there for a little over four years; mom for slightly less. I graduated with my A.A.S. in CADD on Friday, May 11, 2012 at 7:30p.m. I’m
going to get a few tattoos, blue highlights in my hair, another set of
piercings in my ears. And you know what? That may make me strange to a lot of
people. But I don’t care. I know that the people who truly care about me will
not judge me for my craziness. I’m not your average every day girl. I like
getting down and dirty and getting things done. I enjoy learning how to work on
an engine, or going mud bogging after the rain. I can take care of myself; I go
well armed. I’m not a prissy girl and I don’t usually like to wear dresses and makeup,
but I can when I feel it's necessary or fun. I would much rather be in jeans, an old t-shirt and my tennis shoes
or boots. I love my long hair, but it’s usually up in a bun or ponytail or
braided so that it’s out of the way. I wear a LOT of rings, necklaces,
bracelets, and earrings. And at the same time, I can take all of the jewelry
off and go get greasy under the hood of a car. I sort of know what I’m doing as
far as mechanic work goes. I can diagnose things on a vehicle, and fix some of
them. I am learning to use CAD programs to create houses and buildings and I’m
learning that I love doing it. I love looking at architecture and deciding what
I like and what I don’t and how things fit together and how a house flows. I’m
going to be an architect. I’m going to do whatever I can to make the world a
better place. Eventually I'm going to start a youth center/group home type of place for "throw-away" kids. And if all this makes me strange, I’m alright with that. And you
know why?? Because I have some of the most amazing people in my life. I
am beautiful. I am okay with being strange. And if anyone can’t handle me just
the way I am, feel free to see yourself out of my life.I
am living with Jonathan D. Cooke and you know, I’m starting to think we have a
chance to make it. I have no idea if he feels the same, but he tells me often
that he loves me; often enough that I know it’s true but not so often that he’s
wearing it out or that it feels like he’s trying to convince himself of it…and
I appreciate that. He’s the only guy I’ve ever dated that didn’t promise me
everything right off. In
another life, I might have made different decisions…but I’ll never know the
consequences of that, because I didn’t make those decisions. *shrug* Do I move too fast? Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. Maybe
it’s just that it’s time for me to live my own life, be my own person and
create my own opinions. I need to figure out what I’m doing with myself, who I am
going to shape myself into…I have some ideas, but now I have to put them into
practice...maybe I will reconcile myself to who I used to be…or maybe
I will become someone entirely different, someone that nobody expected or could
have predicted…that sounds like a good plan. Who am I? Is still the million
dollar question…and I’m ready to figure that out….
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